I’m going to be honest: I’ve rewritten the opening sentences of this post half a dozen times. I simply don’t know how to start. Where, exactly, do I begin? With the call? With her birth? With a timeline? With yesterday?
Maybe I’ll just start from here, the now. I will begin by saying what the last hour and a half of my evening looked like. I was in my daughter’s room, rocking her back to sleep for the third time tonight, and kissing her sweet face. I’m not sure why she was waking up (I feel like I never really know…), but the second she was in my arms, she curled up towards me, snuggled in, and fell to sleep again. We’ve had lots of these sweet moments together, and tonight was, in many ways, no different.
But then, in one big way, it was different. Yesterday we had our finalization in court, and finally…finally!…the last word was in. Today, from the moment we woke up to right now and for every moment to come, she is ours. There is nothing, no one, to change that. Even though we have loved her with everything in us from the very beginning, the snuggles and the kisses tonight were wet with happy, grateful, and let-it-all-out-it’s-finally-finished tears. All the hoping, all the wishing, and all the waiting–all has been worth it. She’s ours.